Saturday, October 28, 2017

The Heaven Wants Her More! 

I feel all the organs of my body are screaming. They are screaming so loud. I hear their noiseless screams. My body is shaking inwardly. Every tear is trying to catch up with the other. Is it a marathon? I'm speechless. I'm helpless. Trying to have the organs  communicate with each other. They are unsure how to react. React in celebration of a soul well lived or condole each other for the loss. Then lost a touch they infrequently experienced. They lost an encourager who gave them strength. Then lost a mother who did not give birth to them. Maiya Maso, they lost everything!


May  your soul Rest In Peace. Amen

Friday, October 27, 2017

Everyday, I love you 
by
Boyzone

https://youtu.be/6QQQKJJBJOY
I don't know, but I believe
That some things are meant to be
And that you'll make a better me
Everyday I love you
I never thought that dreams came true
But you showed me that they do
You know that I learn something new
Everyday I love you
'Cause I believe that destiny
Is out of our control (don't you know that I do)
And you'll never live until you love
With all your heart and soul
It's a touch when I feel bad
It's a smile when I get mad
All the little things I am
Everyday I love you
Everyday I love you boy
Everyday I love you
'Cause I believe that destiny
Is out of our control (don't you know that I do)
And you'll never live until you love
With all your heart and soul
If I asked would you say yes?
Together we're the very best
I know that I am truly blessed
Everyday I love you
And I'll give you my best
Everyday I love you

Thursday, October 26, 2017

Thou Shall not Judge
An eventful day


Today, I was running late because I could not find my key which I had conveniently kept in one of my shoe boxes. I am not sure why or how!! Anyways, to make my life eventful and exciting on my way to work I was stopped by a COP👮. I got nervous and panicked. He calmed me down. He asked me where I was from. I said Pakistan and continued with my most inappropriate and irrelevant comment in my panic mode. "I hope just because I am from Pakistan, you won't judge me and give me another ticket.". He smiled and went over some laws with me. He was such a gentleman.  Thank you COP! Hope not to see you on the road again. 

Friday, October 20, 2017

it is a date

It's a date Maso (aunt). Be ready, I will pick you up two blocks away from your house. Picking her up from her house was not a problem. But we just wanted to do it the Bollywood style (Chup Chup k milna). Isn't it crazy that I shared this adventurous and crazy relationship with her. She used to walk a few blocks few blocks away from her house to meet with me at the corner. She did it for us. What a sport some relationships are in our lives so natural? They cherish you for who you are, they spoil you and  just tag along with you on your adventures craziest plans.

 People say that perfection cannot be improved. What do you do for a perfection which is on another level. She was an epitome and prototype of perfection. Everything in her life was organized. Her clothes all sorted by color, shape, size and style. She could not tolerate any mess around her except for the  messy and disorganized me. 

Well things don't always go our way. My heart just stopped beating and my breath just froze the day I heard her helpless voice. "Maso, how could you be helpless?"The pillar of strength! 

How an illness separate us from the ones we once connected to. Can I go back in time and try to avail all opportunities that I missed  to spend with her. 

I hate losing control and being vulnerable. Realistically, isn't the weakest and the most vulnerable times and choices in our life make us realize how special some people and their relationships are. 

Actually, they always will be.

Sunday, October 8, 2017

Moonlight 


Sometimes when people are leaving they give you an assurance of how great you are. I wonder if that assurance and those compliments are their way of boasting your ego before they leave. Maybe they want to make sure that they leave the ocean inside your existence calm. Calmness is what we all desire, but in reality chaos always acts as a catalyst, changes everything and helps you reset.

Reset to redefine. Reset to rediscover. Reset to re-establish. Reset to reconcile with yourself. Reset to renew. Reset to reorganize. Reset to readjust. Reset to rejuvenate. Reset to reboot your life.  Will it help you to become new?

In the process of this emotional wear and tear, do you question their honesty or just accept it as it comes? Well, the reality is even if you question they might just be helping you not to erupt like a volanco? At least not in front of them.

Life is mysterious like that, you would never know the true intentions of anyone. Like you will never know how harmful natural disasters might be till they come and go. Leaving everything destroyed only to rebuild. 

So what happened...

They met after years. He slowly had moved away from her life. She knew the reality but just did not want to accept it. Acceptance of circumstances are hard. It leaves you torn and it keeps you hanging on sharp edges of blades that can cut not only the heart but also the soul into million pieces. Any wrong move or pick between heart and brain, might end up into a phase of depression and of course, who wants it. In the battle of her heart and brain. The heart in her instance kept on winning. Was she intentionally letting her brain loose to her heart? Even if she had no answers to that question that kept coming back. She wanted to  kept going with the flow. 

She had met this guy a few years ago and fell in love. For her love was constant. Today she was meeting him so he could ask her for forgiveness and move on. How hard can be that meeting? They went down the memory lane and discussed their chilling stories. It was intriguing because what he thought was funny she did not remember and what was funny to her, he had no idea of. They liked different things about each other. Anyways, it was time. 
The reality of life is the pain it has to accept. Even though, she knew it was their last meeting she wanted to give it some meaning and tried to make memories in her own way. Was the dark semi-deserted restaurant's parking lot a place to hang out? The moonlight was giving this meeting some perspective. Giving light in the darkness. He was forgiven and she was too. The moonlight did its magic.